Don't get me wrong; I don't hate dishwashers. But they have a time and place. I use mine now and then only to ensure that it works. Here is why I prefer to wash and dry dishes by hand most of the time.
Kids: Yup, they can help out with this chore. It is a terrific way to teach them that some tasks need doing even if those chores are unpleasant. Dare I use the word: responsibility? But as a parent, help the kids out. Doing dishes will slow things down and allow time for a bit of banter (hopefully) instead of running off right after the family meal.
Be ready for the next meal: How often do you find the pot or utensils that you need unwashed in a half-filled dishwasher? You either wind up owning two or three of everything or washing them by hand anyway because they are needed immediately. Having two or three of everything sounds ok in theory, but it's not so great when you're rummaging through over-filled drawers looking for the right spatula or knife while the sauce is burning.
Time: It takes less time to wash and dry dishes than it does to rinse plates; then to load the dishwasher; then to wait for 2 hours or the next morning before they are unloaded and put away -- never mind that they may have to be wiped again to remove spots. AND, you have to run soapy water to clean the table and counters anyways.
Efficiency Hint: I always fill one side of the sink with hot soapy water to wash the pots, pans, plates, and utensils that I'm finished with as I cook. It makes cleanup easier.
Company: Don't do dishes while you have company. It's rude. Just stack the dishes and pots and pans out of the way and deal with those either after the company leaves or in the morning. Which brings me to which dishes I use.
An old guy like me has accumulated more than one set of dishes in a lifetime. One was a wedding gift a thousand years ago. It has an attractive autumn pattern and gold trim that I use for company in the fall and winter months. I have another set with blue and silver trim that I use for special occasions during the spring and summer months. Neither are dishwasher safe.
It seems out fashion or "old school", but I think a nice table setting for formal dinners creates the impression that I value the company. I think it helps to make the occasion as special as possible. Now, my daughter has a special set of china too, and it is still packed in a box because she is not yet in the same place in her life. Her set is not dishwasher safe either
All that to say, when I host a meal for eight or even twenty or more people, the dishwasher gets used for only pots and pans and a few serving dishes because otherwise it would be running several shifts to get everything clean.
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